Cupcakes

I love cupcakes. I love to bake cupcakes & I love to decorate cupcakes & I love to eat cupcakes. I think they're so cute & petite. Just because I love cupcakes doesn't mean I can maintain a healthy diet eating only cupcakes...& it doesn't matter that they're vegan. If I was to eat only cupcakes for a full week, my stomach would be churning & I'd be on a sugar overload & my body would be craving something of substance.

There are a lot of good Christian books & commentaries out there. There are also a lot of misleading Christian books & commentaries. I have a few that I highly encourage & have read through quite a few times, but I can't find nourishment for my soul by reading Christian books & commentaries. In order to maintain a healthy spiritual diet it is critical that we spend time seeking the Lord's presence, reading our Bibles, & praying. The thing about Christian books & commentaries is that they are a person's opinion. A person's opinion- people prone to expressing their thoughts as "truth" instead of "a possible interpretation". Everything that I hear I seek out for myself in my Bible. When I hear something that I know isn't of the Lord I don't keep perverting my mind with that person's opinions hoping to hear something "good"- a little leaven ruins the WHOLE batch. Our spiritual selves are craving something of substance that can ONLY be satisfied with the Word of God. We've become a generation that needs to be entertained instead of one that can dig in deep & discover the revelations in the Word.

I want to be a part of a generation that seeks the face of God & the culture of Heaven instead of feeding an appetite for tolerance.

My encouragement for you is to crack open your Bibles & find out what the Word of God says for yourself.

Don't be mislead.

** I listen to a lot of sermons in my down time.
Here is a list of my favorite pastors to listen to:

Judah Smith (The City Church)
Alex Mendoza (New Beginnings Salem - my pastor)
Robert Morris (Gateway Church)
Chris Hodges (Church of the Highlands)
Elijah Waters (The City Church / Generation Church)
Larry Stockstill (Bethany World Prayer Center)
Jonathan Stockstill (Bethany World Prayer Center)
Joe Champion (Celebration Church, Texas)

Sigh No More

Serve God, love me and mend
This is not the end
Lived unbruised, we are friends
And I'm sorry
I'm sorry

Sigh no more, no more
One foot in sea and one on shore
My heart was never pure
And you know me
You know me

But man is a giddy thing
Oh man is a giddy thing
Oh man is a giddy thing
Oh man is a giddy thing

Love it will not betray you
Dismay or enslave you, it will set you free
Be more like the man you were made to be
There is a design, an alignment, a cry
Of my heart to see,
The beauty of love as it was made to be

- Mumford & Sons

Transparency

In the minimal free time that I have, I have been reading through Larry Stockstill's book The Remnant. I'm going to share a lengthy portion of the preface here because I just cannot seem to stop considering it these past few days.

"I'm going to shake this nation. The words thundered into my spirit on an airplane somewhere over Oklahoma. . . . When I returned home that evening, the Lord spoke to me again about His promised shaking, that it would begin with the body of Christ and would be unlike anything we had ever experienced before. I asked the Lord to begin by shaking me, waking me out of my own lethargy and sleep. I then shared this word with a small group of pastors I meet with monthly in Baton Rouge for fellowship and accountability. Finally, I preached on it that weekend at our church, Bethany World Prayer Center, where I have been pastoring for almost twenty-five years. We all took the challenge to allow the Lord to stir the smoldering coals of our hearts and awaken us from the stupor of apathy. . . .

"As painful as God's shaking has been (and will continue to be), it  has awakened a new breed of pastors and laypeople alike who will ask the tough questions: Where has the glory gone (God's glory, that is) in the American church? When did we make the shift from laying it all down for the sake of Christ to joining the latest "bless me" club? When did the simple, pure gospel of the Savior become about "me", "my", and "mine"? What happened to the transparency and integrity that marked the church for centuries, when following Christ meant hardship, denial, and even death? . . .

"However, the question becomes, how much longer will God tolerate our duplicity? It is amazing to me that as our churches grow larger, our nation seemingly grows darker morally. The church seems obsessed with growth and 'relating' to America, but it reminds me of Samson before his haircut. Though engaged in immorality, Samson continued to function in his gift for years, but he no longer carried his anointing.

"How can an individual continue to grow a huge church or ministry and yet be struggling with secret sin? The answer is simple: a person's gift will make room for him and attract the notice and attention of others. Furthermore, that gift, though legitimate and God given, can be operated in pride and arrogance rather than in submission to God. This was Satan's problem: unbroken, unyielded giftings.

 "In the church world, education, connections, manipulation, innovation, entrepreneurship, and aggressiveness can amplify a person's gift. The fact that someone's ministry continues to expand and looks exciting is no guarantee that the person is operating in the anointing.

"The anointing operates in brokenness and is yielded at the cross. The anointing focuses people on Jesus instead of a person. It is 'pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy' (James 3:17 NKJV). The anointing submits to the correction of others, is transparent, and operates in relaxation and peace.

"When we begin to force ourselves, assert ourselves, and promote ourselves, we are moving in our gifting. Unless we daily bring our giftedness to the cross and allow it to be broken, we can easily move into the pride and curse that Satan suffered in heaven.

"God is calling for change. . . . We have a unique calling in the body of Christ. We each exert influence in our families, churches, and communities. Our lives are our ministries, and as such, they must reflect only the highest standards of integrity."

- Taken from The Remnant by Larry Stockstill
(Purchase the book on Amazon.com.)

After all of that I'm not sure that there's much I need to say. There are so many things to focus on & take from the selection above (& the entire book for that matter), but for the sake of space I am going to share an area in my life that has been a struggle lately.

I like to compartmentalize my life. I want to keep my relationship with the Lord in a box, my ministry in another box, keep my personal/family life in a third box, & then again my educational/professional life in a fourth box- there must be more boxes, but this is all I can think of at the moment. I'm a private person who doesn't necessarily want everyone to know the joys, pains, temptations, & victories that I experience daily. I put barriers up to keep people out, the trouble is that's not ministry. How can I be real, genuine, & transparent with people if I won't share what is going on in my life or what God is showing me?

I want to be available to people.

I want to be transparent with people.

I want to serve people as they walk down a path that I've been down before- both rough paths & joyous paths.

I want to encourage people to explore their God-given gifts & abilities & to submit those at the cross as worship to a great God!

I want to be used by the Lord to build a team that effectively equips people, so they are able to minister to God through praise & worship in an unbridled manner, both corporately & privately.

I want to walk in integrity & live a life of ministry that reflects the indelible grace of God & the ardent love of my Saviour, Jesus Christ.

So this is my first step at becoming more transparent. No more boxes, no more walls.

I want to daily submit my gifts & will to His will & to seek His presence & operate in His anointing through brokenness & humility.

I want to be shaken by God.

"Forever You will stand
Your kingdom has no end 

O Holy God I stay amazed
You are so much more than words could ever say
O Holy God I pour out my praise
On the One who never ceases to amaze"

flats & soles

I'm not the technologically savvy type of girl. If you were to ask me for a screwdriver, I would ask you "plus or minus?". So naturally, having a tire go flat on me this past weekend left me feeling like a helpless female. I don't know the first thing about changing a tire. Thankfully on of the pastors from my church & his step-father came out to put my spare tire on. The spare is this little baby thing that has a warning on it informing the driver not to drive faster than fifty miles per hour. However, I forgot that little recommendation until I was on the freeway on-ramp yesterday pissing everyone off by driving forty-five in a sixty with my hazard lights flashing.

When I think of tires, I automatically think of Les Schwab, so I made my way over there after work this morning to get the tire fixed. Everything started off pretty well- he asked what tire was flat & I confidently informed him that it was the back right tire. I also told him that it has a locking lug nut (Silly...? Probably) & then my terminology took a turn for the worse as I stated that the "screwy thing" was also in the front along with the "panel-y" thing that covers the lugs. He chuckled a little bit as I put my hand to my forehead & confessed that I'm not very good at this.

Thankfully the van is confidently mobile again & I can drive over fifty miles per hour. If only they had someone who could fix this huge hole in the sole of my shoe so I wouldn't have to buy another pair for two more weeks of work.
 
 

The London Soap Dilemma

I ran across this a few years ago while in college. Even now when I read it I laugh ridiculously hard. That being said, enjoy & happy laughing.

___________________________

Attached is some correspondence which actually occurred between a London hotel's staff and one of its guests. The London hotel involved submitted this to the Sunday Times. No name was mentioned.

Dear Maid,

Please do not leave any more of those little bars of soap in my bathroom since I have brought my own bath-sized Dial. Please remove the six unopened little bars from the shelf under the medicine chest and another three in the shower soap dish. They are in my way.

Thank you,

S. Berman

Dear Room 635,

I am not your regular maid. She will be back tomorrow, Thursday, from her day off. I took the 3 hotel soaps out of the shower soap dish as you requested. The 6 bars on your shelf I took out of your way and put on top of your Kleenex dispenser in case you should change your mind. This leaves only the 3 bars I left today which my instructions from the management is to leave 3 soaps daily. I hope this is satisfactory.

Kathy, Relief Maid

Dear Maid -- I hope you are my regular maid.

Apparently Kathy did not tell you about my note to her concerning the little bars of soap. When I got back to my room this evening I found you had added 3 little Camays to the shelf under my medicine cabinet. I am going to be here in the hotel for two weeks and have brought my own bath-size Dial so I won't need those 6 little Camays which are on the shelf. They are in my way when shaving, brushing teeth, etc. Please remove them.

S. Berman

Dear Mr. Berman,

My day off was last Wed. so the relief maid left 3 hotel soaps which we are instructed by the management. I took the 6 soaps which were in your way on the shelf and put them in the soap dish where your Dial was. I put the Dial in the medicine cabinet for your convenience. I didn't remove the 3 complimentary soaps which are always placed inside the medicine cabinet for all new check-ins and which you did not object to when you checked in last Monday. Please let me know if I can (be) of further assistance.

Your regular maid, Dotty

Dear Mr. Berman,

The assistant manager, Mr. Kensedder, informed me this A.M. that you called him last evening and said you were unhappy with your maid service. I have assigned a new girl to your room. I hope you will accept my apologies for any past inconvenience. If you have any future complaints please contact me so I can give it my personal attention. Call extension 1108 between 8AM and 5PM.

Thank you.

Elaine Carmen, Housekeeper

Dear Miss Carmen,

It is impossible to contact you by phone since I leave the hotel for business at 745 AM and don't get back before 530 or 6PM. That's the reason I called Mr. Kensedder last night. You were already off duty. I only asked Mr. Kensedder if he could do anything about those little bars of soap. The new maid you assigned me must have thought I was a new check-in today, since she left another 3 bars of hotel soap in my medicine cabinet along with her regular delivery of 3 bars on the bath-room shelf. In just 5 days here I have accumulated 24 little bars of soap. Why are you doing this to me?

S. Berman

Dear Mr. Berman,

Your maid, Kathy, has been instructed to stop delivering soap to your room and remove the extra soaps. If I can be of further assistance, please call extension 1108 between 8AM and 5PM.

Thank you,

Elaine Carmen, Housekeeper

Dear Mr. Kensedder,

My bath-size Dial is missing! Every bar of soap was taken from my room including my own bath-size Dial! I came in late last night and had to call the bellhop to bring me 4 little Cashmere Bouquets.

S. Berman

Dear Mr. Berman,

I have informed our housekeeper, Elaine Carmen, of your soap problem. I cannot understand why there was no soap in your room since our maids are instructed to leave 3 bars of soap each time they service a room. The situation will be rectified immediately. Please accept my apologies for the inconvenience.

Martin L. Kensedder, Assistant Manager

Dear Mrs. Carmen,

Who the hell left 54 little bars of Camay in my room? I came in last night and found 54 little bars of soap. I don't want 54 little bars of Camay. I want my one damn bar of bath-size Dial. Do you realize I have 54 bars of soap in here. All I want is my bath size Dial. Please give me back my bath-size Dial.

S. Berman

Dear Mr. Berman,

You complained of too much soap in your room so I had them removed. Then you complained to Mr. Kensedder that all your soap was missing so I personally returned them. The 24 Camays which had been taken and the 3 Camays you are supposed to receive daily (sic). I don't know anything about the 4 Cashmere Bouquets. Obviously your maid, Kathy, did not know I had returned your soaps so she also brought 24 Camays plus the 3 daily Camays. I don't know where you got the idea this hotel issues bath-size Dial. I was able to locate some bath-size Ivory which I left in your room.

Elaine Carmen, Housekeeper

Dear Mrs. Carmen,

Just a short note to bring you up-to-date on my latest soap inventory.

As of today I possess:
- On shelf under medicine cabinet - 18 Camay in 4 stacks of 4 and 1 stack of 2.
- On Kleenex dispenser - 11 Camay in 2 stacks of 4 and 1 stack of 3.
- On bedroom dresser - 1 stack of 3 Cashmere Bouquet, 1 stack of 4 hotel-size Ivory, and 8 Camay in 2 stacks of 4.
- Inside medicine cabinet - 14 Camay in 3 stacks of 4 and 1 stack of 2.
- In shower soap dish - 6 Camay, very moist.
- On northeast corner of tub - 1 Cashmere Bouquet, slightly used.
- On northwest corner of tub - 6 Camays in 2 stacks of 3.

Please ask Kathy when she services my room to make sure the stacks are neatly piled and dusted. Also, please advise her that stacks of more than 4 have a tendency to tip. May I suggest that my bedroom window sill is not in use and will make an excellent spot for future soap deliveries. One more item, I have purchased another bar of bath-sized Dial which I am keeping in the hotel vault in order to avoid further misunderstandings.

S. Berman

Randoms

- I hate fake plants, but they seem to be the only ones I can keep alive. My dream of planting a garden should be monitored closely by someone other than myself.

- I killed a hamster once because I sat on it...accidentally. R.I.P. Hammie. *moment of silence*

- I always turn lights off if I don't need them, it's not that I'm anal about the utilities or anything, it's just habit.

- I will always love Bryan Adams' music...& whenever "Everything I Do, I Do It For You" comes on I freak out saying "I love this song" & then I'm a sucker until it's over.

- I keep random lists in my phone. Examples: "Bible Notes", "Books", "Bucket List", "Gift Ideas", "Missing Items", "Movies", "Restaurants", & "Summertime Activities".

- I am blessed to have strictly platonic guys that I can talk about guys with.

- Oatmeal is my breakfast of choice. I was recently informed that putting peanut butter in it is the best & I can now attest to the fact that peanut butter in oatmeal is ambrosial.

- I have fuzzy bunny syndrome, but the song "Kill the Turkey" by Gregory & the Hawk is hysterical!

- I cry at weddings & baptisms & anytime a person does something truly heroic.

- I enjoy reading the dictionary & the thesaurus.

- I love a good pair of blue jeans.

- I think Nickelback is the worst band I've ever heard. No apologies.

- My top five vacations ever: Disneyland, New York City, Puerto Rico, Hawaii, & the Oregon Coast.

- I complain about the rain, but secretly (just between you & me) I love it.

- I like to leave notes for myself on mirrors & windows with a dry erase marker.

- I have aspirations to travel to various countries to live simply & serve people.

- Sometimes I read an article on Wikipedia & I keep clicking on links until it's been hours & numerous articles & I feel enlightened. Then I remember that Wikipedia isn't a credible source.

- My favorite boys live in Virginia. Also, they're seven & five years old.

- The day after I watched "Spinal Tap" for the first time I found a "Build Your Own Stonehenge" kit & bought it impulsively on the spot. It was necessary.

- A day with just music is a good day.

- I hate math, but I love sudoku.

- My weakness is a nice smile & a good sense of humour.

- I sleep with a fan, it's very relaxing. That's probably why I always get sleepy when I hear fan noises.

- My favorite smells are bonfires, babies, & Jackson guitars...but not together.

- I love meeting new people & having new conversations, but I could also spend a week alone & not even notice the lack of human interaction. I tend to describe myself as an "outgoing introvert".

- When I listen to Chicago I find myself singing along with the horn parts.

- Whenever I hear a new good song I listen to it on repeat for days.

- Cozying up in front of a fireplace with a big blanket, hot tea, & a good book is so relaxing for me.

- Not very many people knew I could sing until I got to college.

- I have a box full of one-pound bags of coffee in my closet.

- Sometimes when I make mix cds the songs should be read into a bit...but not always.

- I love to play card games & could do it for hours.

- Sometimes when I think of funny memories I find myself laughing out loud really hard...which, to other people around, may make me look quite crazy.

- I'm not very observant...my head is in the clouds most of the time.

- I've watched "Friends" so much that when I watch it now I feel like the seventh friend.

- Urban Dictionary cracks me up more than it should.

- I thrive on simplicity, but my life is generally busy. Can someone explain this to me?

- My family is huge & I always look forward to seeing them.

- I think there are more cars that I hate the look of than cars that I like the look of.

- Whenever I sing popular songs from the mid-nineties it reminds me of an extreme water fight with Cyle, Kristyn, & Tommy at camp while the campers were sleeping.

- I love to fold laundry, but I think that hanging clothes up is the worst chore there is.

- In college, my friends joked that I loved to eat my "plate of one thing"...& I still do that.

- I'm horrible at remembering names.

- Jane Austen is my favorite author.

- I still believe in chivalry & look for that in men.

- There are certain things you just can't "skimp out" on.

- I love watching sports, but I'm not a raging fan of any one team.

- Flip flops = love

- I love swimming in rivers & lakes & oceans.

- Peaches & pears are my favorite fruits.

- Water with cucumber & lemon in it is the most refreshing thing ever!

- The movie "Cars" made me cry.

- ...so did "Monster's Inc."

- Summer 2005 was the best ever & summer 2008 (the summer of the ocho) was a close second. I estimate that it comes in threes so summer 2011 should be amazing.

- My nieces are my favorite cuddle-buddies.

- When I visit the humane society to pet puppies (yes, I do it occasionally...) I always want to bring home every animal. Even those Alanis Morissette commercials make me cry.

- The greatest romance of my life is Jesus Christ.

March Resolutions

I’ve never really been the “New Year’s Resolution” type. Maybe a new year just isn’t enough motivation for me to keep a resolution, or maybe I just never bought into the whole thing. On that note, I’m making a March resolution—it could have been a February one if I had realized sooner that I need to make a change. I want to be present with people. One of my cousins is a pastor in Texas & he writes a blog called The Empty Pulpit. In a recent blog entry entitled “Jesus Didn’t Die on the Cross so You Could Go to Another Meeting”, he discussed how so many meetings he has attended throughout his ministry could have taken much less time. At the end of his blog he wrote this:

               

“I shared a wonderful meal this morning with a member of my church. After about an hour he asked, ‘When do you have to be at the office?’ I told him, ‘There is nothing at the office more important than this conversation.’

“That’s all I have to say about that.”

That last bit hit me…hard. It got me to thinking about the many times that I’ve been with a person (or group of people) & haven’t truly been there. Sometimes I am texting & sometimes my mind is thinking about what I am going to eat for lunch (mmmmm…pasta!). Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with texting or considering my meal plans, but when it prevents me from fully engaging with the person who is trying to make use of my presence then I am basically telling that person they are not important.

Last night I was having dinner with two amazing people that I care very much for, but the entire time I kept checking my phone & conversing with other people. I realized halfway through the meal that I was being a total butthole & that these important people deserved my full engagement. Sometimes we need to put the phone away or turn off the outside thoughts & just enjoy the people we are with.

All of that being said, while I was in Dallas for the worship conference last week, the Holy Spirit renewed my sense of direction & my calling. One of the things He made very clear to me is that I need to set apart Wednesdays to spend time in His presence. As a woman I am so easily distracted. I constantly have fifty things rolling around in my head & so many times I will realize in the midst of a project that I did not finish the project I had just been working on. My goal is to free myself from distractions & be fully present in whatever situation I am in—to put my cell phone & iPod away long enough to notice all of the things I consistently overlook.

I will no longer be available on Wednesdays; they are now dedicated to drawing near to my Lord. I am unsatisfied with remaining where I am at—I want to continually seek His presence & move closer to Him.